Archive for December, 2008

Oedipus and Electra Complexes: Are Moms Closer to Their Sons and Dad’s Closer to Their Daughters?

December 31, 2008

Now that I am the mother of one of each gender I have a newfound curiosity in trying to make sense of the differences between Moms and their boys and Moms and their girls…

I guess I’m so curious because I never really bonded with my daughter when she was a newborn. Please don’t say “it’s because you didn’t breastfeed”…you’re a moron… it’s because I was severely depressed and on very heavy and un-necessary mood stabilizers. It was hard for me to feel emotions, hard for me to feel or be loved… it put me on such a low, unemotional level. I loved her and would have taken a bullet for her as my child in a heartbeat, but there wasn’t that lovey dovey thing I feel like I have with my son. Granted, my son and I experienced a life altering, life changing experience together and I bonded with him in that extreme sense without any extra effort on my part.

Read – This.

 I know it’s a long read, but it is very interesting and explains a lot in an almost Freudian way, about how sons and mothers are more apt to bonding more closely than mothers and daughters.

Of course, not everyone is typical of a studied psychological complex.

“As understood today,[3] the Freudian Oedipus complex has two poles. The “positive pole” implies hatred and a death wish for the parent of the same sex (father for boys and mother for girls), and love and attachment towards the parent of the opposite sex. The “negative pole” implies the hatred and death wish directed at the parent of the opposite sex, and love for the parent of the same sex. “

Which makes so much sense.

I remember reading in high school  in my psychology course about how daughters see their mothers as competition to the “Alpha male” of the house and feel like they have to fight the other females for the males attention, regardless of the relationship they have with the male. 

So what do you think, interwebz!?

Resolutions, Really?

December 30, 2008

So I’m sitting here thinking about whether or not a resolution is really worth it this year.

Do I have to?

Do I have to look myself in the face and go “NO YOU WILL NOT DO X Y Z!” “YOU WILL LOSE A QUADRILLION POUNDS!”?

Is that really necessary only for it to get broken two weeks into the new year. I’ve got a half pan of gooey butter cake waiting for my ass.. I need to eat it.

I’ve been telling myself January 1st I’m going to put my heart and soul back into weight watchers, lose the rest of the weight and get it over with but I know if I make a resolution to do it, it won’t get done.

How about we all just say “We’ll do our best this year.” Really.

In other news: My daughter, who is 4, has decided she doesn’t want to get up in the morning anymore, she said she only wants to get up when it’s ‘dark time’ outside… I tried to explain to her over and over again why this is not going to happen. “Well you know what, you’re awake when its dark outside and so is Daddy, and so is Flynn!” Uh oh… I see jealousy rearing its ugly head…

She should resolve to remember the world doesn’t revolve around her.

Oh wait, she’s four, that wont happen…