The Stigma of Being a Young Mom

Me, two weeks ago.
Me, two weeks ago.

Despite how much pregnancy ravages a womans body, with c-section scars, with stretch marks, episotomies, hard labors, spinal headaches, bleeding, sciatic nerves, you name it… we still love our babies. We love and nurture our kids – and we keep having them! Even after the pain and the torture pregnancy puts us through . . it doesn’t stop us from having more children. I love kids enough that I will put myself through up to THREE (since I cant convince my husband to have four) c-sections to have babies and raise a family.

What’s so hard for me to deal with is the stuff in the media today and how it runs off on us young moms who really love, adore, and want our children – it turns into a sweeping generalization.
Take Casey Anthony for example. This little girl is gone, out there somewhere, and this bitch is partying it up and exploring her bi-sexual tendencies and entering the “HOT BODY” contest… Then society sees it and goes “Damn those young mothers having babies, partying it up, and neglecting their children.”  And it makes my chest hurt.  I’ve been married since 17 and a mother since 18 – and I’d never put my child in danger, or party it up if she went missing. The media has put it out there for all of the world to see – and the GOOD young mothers get screwed by the “lump effect”… where all of society lumps us all together… Then they start spouting off statistics about how young mothers children are more likely to be abused and neglected than an older mother… and then we’re all really stigmatized – because people are looking at our kids going “Well, there goes the next Caylee Anythony….that partying whore…” When not all young mothers are like that. I’m 22 now and married for 5 years – one child one on the way… and I still get “lumped” in..
For example, since when did it become standard to ask a pregnant woman, “Are you still with the Dad?” … leaving me perplexed. What the hells gone wrong with our society that this has become an acceptable question to ask somebody? Like this is the norm?
“Uh, yes, both my kids have the same Dad….and I’m married to him…..??” Confused as hell. Is this what our society has groomed people to think? Really?
I think everyone needs to step away from “Drugstore Statistics” and Google “Facts”… and get to know individual people instead of a general population of people.

5 thoughts on “The Stigma of Being a Young Mom

  1. You are right, things are changing at the speed of light and what is right is looked upon as weird. I admire you and wish you the best with your family.

  2. Wow, you are right on with your comments. I just had my second child (I’m 22) and the nurses and doctors kept asking me who was the father, even though my husband was sitting right beside me. Young moms often get a bad rap in society, but by speaking out like you have, I’m sure it will help turn things around for the better. Check out my website for young moms. It’s meant to speak directly to women like you!

  3. i completely agree and am overjoyed to see that i am not making up all the negitivity comming from todays society
    i am a young mother, and love my daughter more than anything in the world, but because of the strange stigma and media projection of young mothers, myself and my child are subjuected to horrible behavior by others.
    i am glad that you are spreading the word that young mothers are just as good as any other parent, and besides age has nothing to do with the ability to parent.
    thank you for your positivity

  4. I ran across this a little later than others but I want to extend my best wishes to you and your family. Keep your healthy perspective, you will go far. I’m 33 and I still hear from other people, “Oh, when you’re older…” It’s just a way for insecure people to exercise perceived dominance over your life. It’s tough to fight that school of thought every day of your life. But you seem to have your priorities in place. Much love, Amy

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