Viva Las Vegas

After spending an entire week either driving to or from Las Vegas or in Las Vegas, we are finally home.  Our first four nights there we stayed at the Excalibur, which isn’t snazzy by any means, but it was cost efficient for those of us who spent almost zero time in the hotel and all of our time out exploring and only used the hotel as a place to shower and crash.

We went down for 311 Day 2010. Yes, as in the band 311 on 3/11/2010. The concert was held at the Mandalay Bay event center. Amazing concert, all sorts of fun was had!

Our time spent not at the concert was spent exploring and going down a rather lengthy list of things I wanted the hubby and I to do and see, as well as his friend who came with us.

Here are a few things we learned during our short time in Las Vegas. Enjoy!

  • Illegal aliens on the sidewalk holding trading cards with naked girls on them do NOT care if your husband is with you, his wife, they will still try to force calling cards for hookers who are on sale for $35 dollars “this weekend only!”.
  • Above mentioned illegal aliens do not like it when you collect all of their cards on your multiple treks up and down the strip then use them to “make it rain” like a deck of purged cards into the air over their heads. (Drunk guy behind us got brave and executed this move).
  • The “time share” people that offer you half price tickets and all sorts of free stuff for coming to visit their new hotel, time share, rental property, spa whatever – will NOT stop. They are relentless, they are at EVERY hotel and casino and they require money up front for their discounted “gifts” to ensure that you go listen to their schpiel. Don’t do it.
  • It’s more expensive to eat here than any other city on the planet, plan to spend the majority of your money on food, not souvenirs, not attractions, not even alcohol – food.
  • Prostitutes at The Burger Joint at 2am with a non-English speaking ‘John’ do not like to “think” their picture is being taken.
  • Above mentioned prostitute also made it very drunkenly clear in her slurred speech that she didn’t carry any cash on her and that her ‘John’ would have to foot the bill.
  • The Eiffel Tower at the Manilow Paris is very cold and windy at night and not recommended for those who are afraid of heights – or who are sensitive enough to feel it move when the wind blows or when somebody pounds past you on observation deck.
  • Even the comedy shows has a half naked dancer in between all of their acts.
  • The Treasure Island outdoor show is no longer family friendly with their scantily clad “sirens”. Apparently a song with the lyrics “…you take a little bit of honey and whole lot of sugar an you shake it, you shake it up…” has something to do with being a pirate? Yeah, not.
  • If you charge me $8.50 for a drink, and Las Vegas allows you to leave any establishment carrying a glass beverage and has no laws against drinking in public or carrying drinks between establishments, consider your glass mine.
  • Bonanno’s inside the MGM Grand Food Court – is the nastiest breakfast food in the fast food planet, go next door to McDonalds. (Really, it’s that bad)
  • You cannot afford to shop inside The Venetian so only go inside if you plan on riding the gondola or taking pictures of the scenery inside.
  • Go to the AM/PM gas station on the strip, purchase mini wine bottles and/or a large 6/12 pack of cans.  Get yourself a pair of cargo pants or a big ass purse and carry around your own liquor to ensure that you do not go bankrupt trying to get drunk in Vegas. You can carry your own alcohol into almost any establishment. Except Denny’s.

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