–noun1.a strong feeling of displeasure and belligerence aroused by awrong;wrath; ire.
Anger is a powerful emotion. Anger makes us do and say things we would not normally do because, if you are a non-violent person, words are your only daggers.
Anger can swoop right into a sane person’s mind and simply take over. It can control what you do with little warning.
It is so hard to stand back in a powerful, life changing, situation and be powerless. “If I had just a little bit of control…” you think to yourself, all the the while knowing that everyone has free will and they must seek out their own destiny or consequence of choice. You hope it’s not the latter, but you ultimately know it will be… and so many people’s lives end up destroyed. Like an atomic bomb comes into a small room and explodes… leaving destruction in its wake and the people on the outside scraping to pick up the pieces of their loved ones broken lives.
When the damage is done we are left with so many questions. Why? Being the first of the questions. How can the people we love be so intent on sabotaging everything they once had, or thought they had? Where did we all go wrong? When did this truly start? What will save this person and how soon can we do it?
After the anger comes sadness and the realization that the person you once loved and looked out for you, that you looked up to, is gone and there is no getting them back. There is a void where that person used to be. It’s almost as if something has possessed the person and they are this lying, untrustworthy snake in the grass who would do throw you on the train tracks for the opportunity to get their next high — when they used to be your confidant, the person who you could ask ANY question and their answer would be honest and straight forward, no sugar coating. No, that person is long gone and now all that is left is a family in shambles and no logical way to pick up the pieces. Children’s lives at stake and a proverbial glass menagerie of memories that no longer exist anywhere except your own mind.
The whole situation makes me hug my kids a little tighter and appreciate my husband a little more knowing he would never let our family fall into such a pit… he loves us so if he saw something happening he would jump in head first to save us and not enable a whole family to be shattered…and I would do the same for him.
I won’t lay down be used.