I love being able to just clickety clack away on my keyboard and rant about random things or get everything that I am thinking out into my blog and free it into the universe…. it is almost like those people who tie a note to a balloon and let it float away or a message in a bottle so to speak – releasing it into the hands of the unsuspecting.
However, I have always loved the feel of a good ink pen, not a ball point – I prefer uniball type pens and believe it or not – up until shortly after my son was born, I kept a journal – a paper journal. I guess I grew out of it or became too busy with life to keep it up . Occasionally, I still find myself purchasing a 40 cent composition book and just free writing for many many pages – 20 plus – about my life, a topic in my life or something new or something I have been dealing with or have been considering…. or even if I just want to congratulate myself – be proud of myself. I have this half filled book in front of me that I started in late 2007…. it has pictures of my pregnancy test and my first ultrasound with my son. (who will be the big 3 tomorrow) and I wished I hadn’t stopped mid paragraph on a page two years ago and had kept up with it.
I have written some of my most deep secrets in it always trusting that my husband would never read it and to this day he hasn’t. That’s some serious trust there people… writing down your deepest darkest secrets, in permanent record and leaving it in your house and sometimes on the nightstand where you spouse could at any time get a wild hair up their ass and read it. That is real trust. Sending your husband off to a strip club to get drunk with all of his single friends — not scary. Leaving your personal journal inside your house under no lock and key – that is serious trust and very scary.
You know what, I think it is time to pick up in that book where I left off…and hopefully my online blog and my journal can live harmoniously in the same world.